Book Review: You Suck, A Love Story, by Christopher Moore, Though Funny, Isn’t His Best

As it happens, that review would be based on a previous review of a book by Moore which I thought was incredible, and titled, Lamb or The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Best Friend. That book was truly sensational and written as a new gospel of Jesus’ life from the perspective of his childhood best friend who was there for those thirty or so years during which Jesus otherwise disappears. That book is fascinating, funny, well-researched and simply a great read.

You Suck, though amusing, was not the best. It took place in San Francisco and provided numerous scenes with rather detailed setting locations so that if you’re familiar with the city (and as I live here, I am) then it’s very enjoyable.

So the story is about a guy who is turned into a vampire by his girlfriend of a few months who was only recently turned into a vampire by a man who had been undead for centuries. Yes, that’s right, it’s a story about love and vampires. As this couple learns how to be successful vampires, they must contend with the elder vampire, the old crew they used to roll with that hunts vampires, their new minion, and then all the people that inadvertently get turned into vampires as this debacle goes down.

It’s light, quick-moving, amusing, and enjoyable and if you’re looking for something to be mindless with and chuckle at at the same time – and especially if you have a penchant for all things vampire, but aren’t too hardcore and serious about it – then this could be the book for you. No matter your penchants I highly recommend Lamb and do think that Christopher Moore is a very good and creative author.

Have you read any of his books? What did you think?

Get your very own copy of You Suck: A Love Story

Fun with the Bible: The Synoptic Gospels and John Crucify Jesus on Different Days – Want to Know Why?

What!? The gospels have contradictory stories?! Yes, I’m afraid it’s true. Now, I’m not going to do all of the legwork for you – you’ll have to read through the stories (at least the key parts at the end) to see for yourself what’s going on – but I will tell you what’s written and, as briefly as possible, what it means.

The Synoptic Gospels are Matthew, Mark and Luke, which are all telling effectively the same story. In their story, there is a Last Supper (you remember – Jesus gives out the bread…’my body’ … etc.), and that Last Supper is what Jewish holiday meal? Passover. Correct! So, Passover is the same day every year: the night of the 14th of the month of Nissan. That means that the next day, the 15th of Nissan, Jesus is crucified (making the 15th a Friday, right?), and then he is resurrected on Sunday the 17th (three days later – Bible counts each of the days whether it’s whole or not).

You with me?

Now, in John, there is a symbolism different than in the Synoptic Gospels: there is no Last Supper (well, at least not an important one that’s mentioned and thought to be Passover), and Jesus is actually crucified on the 14th of Nissan (which is thus, in this story, a Friday) and resurrected on Sunday, which in this story is the 16th of Nissan. But why different dates?

Well, on the 14th of Nissan, during the day, Jews would sacrifice the lamb that was then eaten that night during Passover (an important ritual we won’t get into here). The lamb was always sacrificed on that day, the 14th of Nissan, and the Passover meal eaten that night. For John, Jesus was the Lamb of God (no other gospel uses this language) and John wanted Jesus to be the Passover sacrifice – the ultimate sacrifice that atoned for our sins (which is mostly the purpose of sacrifice – atoning).

John felt this symbolism stood above all else in importance – making Jesus the ultimate passover sacrifice – and so he crucifies Jesus on Friday, the 14th of Nissan. However, considering the Last Supper, as the Passover meal that had the symbolism of the bread and wine as Jesus’ body and blood, to be of utmost importance, the writers of Matthew, Mark and Luke made Jesus’ crucifixion the following day, Friday the 15th of Nissan (since the Passover meal is always the night of the 14th).

Pretty crazy and cool, huh? Today, the symbolism of either gospel is used to create a much larger theology though the dating ultimately makes the two stories irreconcilable with their portrayal of facts. Fascinating theology but impossible factually. Which one is true? We’ll never know, but both are holy canon in Christianity and considered to be 100% accurate.

What do you think? Did you go read for yourself and see? Is anything unclear or would you like to know more? Please just ask – the fascinating literature surrounding these facts in the first few centuries after Jesus (and the simultaneous development of Judaism and its understanding of Passover) is incredible.

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