Mummy III, Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, with Fraser and Jet Li Lives up to First Two

Let me say for the record that I didn’t think the first two were so spectacular so my assessment isn’t so much a compliment as an evaluation. Don’t get me wrong, they were pretty entertaining, but at the same time, eh. So, if you thought the sun rose with the first two Mummy movies then don’t let my review get you down.

I will say that I enjoyed it. It was fun, entertaining, had consistent action (though the final fight scene, in my humble opinion, was just adequate), and I even laughed a couple of times. One thing in particular that I really appreciated, I must share.

As background, Rachel Weisz is not in this film. Thus, someone else had to play Brendan Fraser‘s wife. Maria Bello did a fine job, and god bless them, they did not let the switch go without a joke. Had they not acknowledged the wife-swap (heh heh) I would have been sorely disappointed, but just like any self-respecting Hollywood filmmakers would, they made a joke. And it was well done at that. I kind of hope the entire sub-plot surrounding the joke existed solely for the sake of making the joke work. That would make me particularly happy.

As for the rest of the movie, Jet Li was pretty decent – never even spoke a word of English. I thought the amount of Chinese they used in the movie was pretty good – I hate it when movies take place where they don’t speak English to one another but all of the characters are speaking English. Also, the opening mythology behind the modern day plot was interesting. Special effects weren’t bad either. The action took a bit to get started, but overall it was a reasonable ride.

Yes, all of these adjectives are just so-so. Perhaps that should reflect on more than my writing and vocabulary. The movie was hokey, a little desperate for the third in a series and even prepped itself for a fourth. Honestly though, which of the Mummy movies weren’t cheeseball with a side of desperation.

In summary, if you liked the first ones, you’ll probably like this one and if you were ever a little blahed out by the first two, I’d skip this one. I’ll give it 5.5 Chocolate Salty Balls.

Have you seen it yet? What did you think? Do you know why Rachel Weisz chose not to do this movie?

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Wanted: Action-Packed but Something’s Wanting

Boy was that a lot of blood. Yep, good job people – way to give us a lot of blood. Was it entertaining blood and entertaining action? Yes, fortunately, it was.

How was the plot? Well, when a guild of weavers suddenly becomes the world’s most powerful band of assassins, shaping world affairs according to a giant magical loom that spins a secret textilic language guided by the hand of – yep, you guessed it – fate, you have to wonder who in Hollywood decided not to ask for a few minutes of crafty rewriting. But, hey, Morgan Freeman, Angelina Jolie (and no, you don’t see her topless – just the top of her ass-crack), and some no-name kid give us a reasonable show.

Well, honestly, I don’t know why the main character was who he was. He was a decent actor (though why he got on my ass at the end I’m not sure), but I don’t think he fit the part. I got him for the beginning but I just never bought him as the action-driving super-dude he was supposed to become. And this was the case for the rest of the movie. I never really got sucked into it: the plot, the characters or any of it really. I wanted to be sucked in and am very forthcoming when it comes to allowing myself to get into a movie, but this just never brought me there.

Overall, I only feel comfortable giving it 5 Chocolate Salty Balls, an average score for an average movie. Have you seen it? What did you think? Did Angelina Jolie look anorexic to you? Get your own copy of Wanted

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