Kyle Swims Through a Water Park of “Pee” in the South Park Season 13 Finale

This was the last episode of the 13th season of South Park. That makes me sad. Wednesday nights will be forever emptier because of this. Well, not forever more. They’ll be better again in a few months when South Park is back.

In this episode, the boys go to the local water park, Pi Pi’s, where Kyle opts to stay out of the water indefinitely due to its incredibly high concentration of urine. Cartman, however, is disappointed for other reasons: the water park is filled with minorities.

Black people.



He thinks he even saw some Native Americans.

This, of course, is less stated than it is sung in a beautiful song. Trey Parker is quite the composer – always has been. Indeed, Cartman predicts that the Mayans got the year of the Apocalypse wrong and that rather then 2012, it’s actually happening in 2009, since the water park has been taken over by minorities and Cartman is the “last of his kind.”

When warned that the pee content of his water park is so high that the park is on the verge of disaster, Pi Pi does nothing – to the detriment of human kind . . . well, human kind currently in attendance at his water park. With the urination of one final little girl, the water becomes 100% pee and disaster ensues. Everything goes to hell – in Cartman’s eyes, the Mayan Apocalypse.

In order to drain the pee from the park, Kyle has to hold his breath and swim through it down to an underwater release valve, but in order to do that he must first drink pee in order to avoid the bends. Since pee grosses him out so much, this is obviously a monumental task. It’s pretty hilarious listening to the other boys be honest about all the things they do related to pee that Kyle considers unacceptable:

– pee in the shower

– pee in the pool

– not wash their hands after peeing

Gross!! I’d never not wash my hands after peeing. Yeah . . . never . . .

Obviously the moment Kyle drank the pee they were all rescued, since is was discovered that the antidote to anger caused by the overexposure to pee is bananas. And yes, the part where the monkeys got angry while getting urinated on was hilarious and disgusting.

Funny enough, I loved that Kyle hated bananas so much and had to eat one after drinking the pee. Why? My wife loves most foods but HATES bananas. She finds them revolting, particularly the smell. Sometimes to be cruel when we’re at the grocery store I’ll hold a bunch of bananas behind her head and then say her name so that she turns around and finds them there. She hates that. I’m very mature.

This wasn’t a killer episode like a few of the other poignant ones this season, but it was amusing, particularly the unbearably racist sentiments that got called out and exposed for being illogical: minorities are beginning to make up the majority. Get used to it. It’s okay and that’s where things were going. We’re all immigrants – thanks White Stripes.

An interesting aside: there was a commercial for Avatar during South Park, which is interesting because last week’s episode made fun of Avatar and showed South Park being really angry that the movie was ripping off something else (I asked what that something else was but nobody knew to tell me).

What’d you think of this episode? Did you like it? What did you think about the 13th season? Which episode was your favorite.

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Status Report: Jesus Didn’t Murder Me at the Water Park

Despite the challenge I issued to Jesus yesterday, I am still alive. This doesn’t say anything about Jesus’ existence or power of course – only that I didn’t piss him off. I said, Jesus, if I’ve angered you with the inaccuracy of my statements about you, then I’ll be at a water park today and you’ll have your opportunity. Well, I’m happy to report that it was an awesome day at the water park – filled with fun rides, great times and lots of wetness. Eszter and I floated around the river, road every ride in the park and waited in virtually no lines. If I had to say so I’d say that Jesus was pretty pleased about my recent blogging. Thanks big guy!

Tonight’s South Park Episode: Timmy 2000 (404)

A hilarious episode about ADD, Attention Deficit Disorder, is tonight’s show. I seriously agree with what South Park is saying about the damaging effects of Ritalin. Sure, some kids may need it, but probably a fraction of a percent of those to whom doctors were prescribing it between 1995 and 2005. Most of these kids just needed more love and attention from their parents. They had PADD, Parental Attention Deficit Disorder. Love your children, people, don’t medicate them.

And related to religion….at the beginning of the episode, Mr. Garrison has assigned a lot of homework to the class and is looking for someone to start answering the questions. Cartman begs Jesus to prevent Mr. Garrison from calling on him and then when Mr. Garrison calls on someone else Cartman says, “Oh thank you, Lord. Praise Jesus!” Do we really believe that Jesus cares about such things? Do we think that Cartman believes that Jesus was really listening and acting on his behalf. Like with the word God, South Park is calling our attention (since clearly we have some related disorders) to the overuse of the term, and moreso, to the absurdity that Jesus is listening to nonsense like this.

This is not to deny Jesus. If you want to believe that he is there answering your prayers, that’s totally your prerogative and who would I be to deny it. However, if you’re a giant piece of shit like Cartman and your prayers are about getting you out of trouble for doing the wrong things, are we really supposed to believe that Jesus is listening to you or wants to help you with those bad things. Even if we believe in Jesus but not that he is listening to such things, the show draws our attention to people like Cartman who, when their prayers are answered, think that Jesus is really up there helping them and on their sides. That is ridiculous and all comes back to this issue of us abusing our imagined deities and our assumptions about the ways they interact with us and the world.

Jesus, if I have offended you, then strike me down – or better yet, I’m going to a water park today, so Jesus, I think if I’ve offended you you’ll see your opportunity to rectify the situation. Good luck to us both!

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